A week or so ago, I had wandered over to my dad's house with Landon...we were killing time while Sydney was at a Girl's Scout camp just around the corner. I was sick...I was tired...I was tired of being sick and tired. To add a little cherry on top, I had just realized that we actually missed the first day of camp because I had written down the wrong dates. Swell. Just swell. And as I'm sure you can tell, my attitude was equally as lovely as all of this "stuff." To accentuate the matter, my dad had the audacity to ask me to name something that was good in my life. Did he not know that now was NOT the time?! No, no, no he didn't. Who am I kidding? He did. He most certainly did. But, you know? Sometimes you just want left alone. You want the freedom to just sit back and not engage in conversations that require a lot of effort. Sometimes, you just want to simply be in the moment. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Well...fast forward to a week later and this SAME conversation came up around the table after Easter dinner. This time, my younger sister had posed the question to her daughter. "Name 4 things you're passionate about (I think this was the wording)." Admittedly, I sat on pins and needles waiting to hear my niece's answer because she was being put in the same {uncomfortable} situation I had been in not too long ago. She named one. Slooowly came two. But, as we'd say in my Kindergarten classroom...she "needed more thinking time." I half-smiled and related to her response or lack of...expecting to move on to a different topic or stare at each other in silence. But ohhhh no. I wasn't going to escape this situation again. The question was then posed to me. ME! Again!
I gave a slight laugh and paused. I quickly named two sports that I haven't played in sixteen years. What?! I stuttered and stumbled and came up with another passion I had {what seemed} eons ago. And then my sister obliged me by offering this token- "And you like writing..." I quickly grabbed a hold of her help and let the question move to my 7 year old and 3.5 year old cohorts. Naturally, Sydney asked if she could name MORE than four. Oh to be a kid again!
So....writing. Yeah. Yeah, I do like to write. While I was grateful that my sister helped me to remember the fact that I do enjoy writing...I was also saddened that my sister had to help me remember the fact that I do enjoy writing. Writing is truly FUN for me. I would even LOVE to author a children's book one day. *I'm still holding out for my sister to be my illustrator.* But, why hadn't I sat down to type a single word in the last 370-some days? There's the obvious answers like...I had a baby. But she's ONE so that isn't the greatest excuse anymore. I work full-time...that's decent. But I also scroll through my social media accounts each night before I go to bed instead of choosing to do something like, say...write!
Ironically, my oldest sister had posed a question to Eric and I earlier that same day...she wanted to know how we coped with living in a high-stress situation {read: adopting while raising 3 other kiddos concurrently} We basically didn't have a good excuse...I think we said something like..."We laugh a lot?" HA! I.don't.even.know. Clearly, we're expert copers. {<---sarcasm}
But writing! People, I like to write! Writing is a way that helped me cope through a lot of my infertility journey. And sooooo I am choosing to hold ON to this passion. I'm dusting off the cobwebs. For myself. Because when I'm old and gray...and my kids have families of their own...I want a leg to stand on. I want an identity that can change through each season of life. I love being a writer. I can write as a mother. I can write as a friend. I can write as a teacher and as a sister. Writing is something that I can identify with in several areas of my life. So here's to writing and sharing bits and pieces of my life and my heart along the way.
Phew. Ok. That was a wild post...but thanks for stopping by! I do have so much to write and share with you all. You know, things like...we have a SON! And...we get to bring him home this summer! And...he's only a month older than our Emmaline! You know...stuff like that. But until then...just do me one little favor. Name four things you're truly passionate about and then think about how those passions are playing out in your life...right now. And if you're bold enough...do something about those passions. Right now.
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